“I’ve Got The Bills Covered”

For those who know me long enough, you know how forgetful I am. I forget where I leave my phone, I come out of my house only to realise I forget to bring my wallet. And of course, in this day and age, we can make all sorts of cashless payments through our phone, but sometimes, I also forget to charge my phone, so I cannot use my Google Pay or Apple Pay, for some of you. And because of this, at times when I head out with friends, they have to help me get the bill, which always makes me feel bad and I would make plans to treat them back or just feel accused for being a consistent scatterbrain. But when I think back, at the moment when my friends or family gladly offers to pay, knowing me, it made me realise the joy and reassurance of being able to humbly receive grace when it is graciously given. Wanting to pay for things by our own means is something we all try to do, and it is often the way it should be. Because we work, we make choices, we offer up what we should. However, there are things that cannot be calculated and paid down to a T. There are times that we are at the receiving end on things that cannot be repaid. But the way we receive it, makes a world of a difference. Like, if my friends offered to pay first but I still sulk in accusations throughout the meal, that would be a drag.

Inability To Pay Up

Now here in Luke 15, we are all familiar with the story of the prodigal son. After squandering away all the money his father gave him, his esteem must have hit rock bottom with guilt and shame. He may even have some ideas of paying back his father in some way.  In verse 18, he said, “ I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ So he got up and went to his father.” Here, he wished to become one of his father’s hired servants. Now, not just when it comes to our interpersonal relationships with people, even our relationship with God can sometimes be like that. When we fail or fall into certain weaknesses and sins, we are quick to determine how God sees us based on how we judge ourselves. “God must be thinking this about me”, “Maybe He has forgotten about me”, “He should give someone else who is better than me at this or that”. Then we will enter into either sides of the path. On one side, we may just continue feeling lousy about our inabilities. While on the other side, we could be thinking of ways that we can make it up by our own means. This is very much like the Prodigal Son’s train of thoughts. When I first became a believer, I was more of a dweller in self pity. Then as time went by, I flipped over to the side of finding methods or solutions to become better like scheduling, time management, putting on a facade. Both ways flopped badly for me, as it would be for any of us. Because one side of the scale, we cannot see God’s love when we are blocked out by our emotions. And on the other side of the scale, we cannot experience God’s provision, because we are too busy utilising our own resources. Both ways will be exhausted and we are back to square one. It is vicious cycle, really. Until we take the first step to approach our Father.

Approach and receive His embrace

In Luke 15:20-24, with the son’s grand plan to be hired as his father’s servants, he was probably anticipating all sorts of bad scenarios, but his father’s reaction when he saw the son, caught him by surprise. It says, “His father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’“But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.” Now, brothers and sisters, the fact is, we are often times squanderers of God’s grace and provision. It is easy to at times neglect, forget or belittle God’s leading and help. We may use what we have or our gifts on other things of the world much more than we could use it for God’s concerns. But here, Jesus has gotten the bill for us when we cannot, and instead of playing through all the ways we are not worthy or fears of drawing near to God, approach Him with humility and surrender, like the son has as he realised his sins. But let us not remain in feelings of despair or inner hesitations, because God does not hold back His love on those who truthfully and willingly come to Him. He is a God that welcomes empty-handed children with open arms.

So as we hear and is reminded of this encouraging and touching story, let us pray to enter the blessed cycle of becoming cheerful discoverers, receivers and givers of God’s love. We are empty handed, but not forsaken by our ever present Provider. God bless.