Upholding Sexual Purity

Some statistics (Put the stats larger font, the source much much smaller font in slides):

• SG Magazine Sex Survey (2018): 45.4% had 5 or more sexual partners in lifetime.
• YouGov survey (Apr 2022): 20% thought should wait till marriage before having sex. 
• Survey by Touch Cyber Wellness (2016): In Singapore, 90% boys (13-15 years old) have watched or read sexually explicit materials.
• “Cru article” in 2019: 70% of church members and attendees had engaged in pornography.
• AWARE-Blackbox survey (2020): Only half of parents comfortable talking to their kids about sex education.
• How can we live as God-pleasing believers in a secular and increasingly permissive society concerning sexual expression and activities?

Importance of sexual purity.

• Sex is sacred in God’s eyes.
• Sex may be a need but it’s not a right.
• Sex is two persons becomingone flesh.
  • <1 Co 6:16> Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.”
• God-permitted sex (union of one man and one woman) closely resembles the unity within the Trinity God.
• Ep 5:3 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. 
• Sexual immorality:
  • Fornication (sex between two persons who are not married to each other).
  • Adultery (sex between two persons when one or both are married to someone else).
• “Anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart” <Mt 5:28>.
• <Heb 13:4> Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.
• God’s design for sex is only within the context of marriage.
• Dating: Know the person living inside the body, instead of exploring the body. “Save sex instead of safe sex”.
• Two key purposes of marital sex: Procreation, and sacred enjoyment of spouse.
• Sex deepens the trust and acceptance in a marriage relationship.
• Sex is exclusive love and intimacy between husband and wife.
• Never choose temporary thrill over obedience to God, or may be left feeling lonely and shameful.
• Celebrate sexual purity.
• Sexual purity: Respect yourself and fellow human beings created in the image of God.

The deadly perils of sexual immorality.

• <1 Co 6> 18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
• Sexual sin harms both parties.
• Unwanted pregnancies, STDs, guilt, shame and loss of self-respect, etc.
• Sexual immorality: Selfishness without regard for God nor spouse, children, others.
• Flee from sexual immorality.
• <Prov 5> 3 For the lips of the adulterous woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; 4 but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword.

We must battle for sexual purity!

• Deep love and satisfaction in Jesus Christ.
• Examine our hearts and lifestyle, to prevent sinful triggers.
• Guard our eyes and ears, heart and mind, mouth, hands.
• Set some boundaries.
• Have accountability partners.
• <1 Co 7> 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
  • Withholding sexual activity can lead a spouse into temptation and sin.
• Find/restore satisfaction in own spouse. (For singles, satisfaction in Christ).
• Marital commitment means being willing to hold onto marital purity, even if we are unhappy sometimes.

Complicated cases.

1) Had pre-marital sex or committed sexual sins before.

• <1 Co 6> 9 Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
• Jesus also said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more” <Jn 8:11>.
• Repent, let God’s forgiveness cover past shame, then move on in God’s grace.
• Resolve to love spouse doubly more, and live in greater sexual purity.

2) Victims of sexual abuse.

• In Christ, God made us new creation, and this new life comes also with new purity.

3) Barriers with healthy marital sexual.

• Despite the problem, still resolve to maintain marital purity.
• Encourage and help each other. Do not accuse and add more stress.
• Continue to hope in the Lord.
• Keep finding satisfaction from one another spiritually, emotionally and practically.

4) Unfulfilled sexual needs in the case of the unmarried.

• Fight to believe Jesus can satisfy.
• Persevere to keep God’s command to live in purity.
• Honor our marriage with Christ, and not dishonour Christ in any way.
• God sees your every effort and pain, He will remember your faithfulness.

5) Pornography.

• Tackle the deeper issues of loneliness, boredom, low self-esteem, cold relationship with God, etc.

Reflection

1. Do you feel the pressure or temptation to conform to the social norm on sexual permissiveness or practices?
2. Do you have any difficulty in upholding sexual purity? What are your struggles? How can you battle them? How do you think the church can support you in this area?